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About Me

Hi! My name is Kara, and welcome to my super fabulous blog! Since I can remember, I have struggled with anxiety, and remember feeling lost, like I had no one. My goal for this blog is to provide a safe environment for young people like me who can relate to this feeling. I also want people to not only feel understood, but to better understand who they are after leaving my blog each day. I am looking forward to sharing my personal experiences, successes, and resources that have personally helped me throughout this journey. By the way, if you are wondering about the title of my blog, it is the title of the first blog post I have ever published, "No Exceptions." (You're going to have to scroll down really far to find it, but trust me, it's worth it!) I wrote this narrative essay last year for a writing contest, that I ended up winning! I based the piece on the struggles I went through when I was 10 years old, after my parents got divorced. I felt so lost, and had a nee...
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Feeling Unloved

I haven't been on here in a while for the simple reason that I was doing good. Now though, I just feel...off. I think it's cause it's October. October was a hard month last year and now I feel like I'm resorting back to how I felt then. Scared, alone, and vulnerable. And all I can see are flashbacks from the past. That's my biggest fear you know. The past, I mean. I see me, in my room, alone. Crying because I feel worthless.  I see my bloody hands from the picking, and I see dad choke slamming me into the wall and calling me names. I see the rituals and the pain. And I can feel the heartbreak and the sense of being unloved. I'm starting to feel that way right now. Unloved. Like maybe I'm not smart enough or pretty enough or good enough for people to love. I know when I tell myself that its just a lie. A lie my mind tells me to trick me. Everyone's loved. Even me. I just dont feel it. This probably makes no sense to you. But to me, well, it makes all th...
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Post Homecoming

Hey everyone! So, it's definitely been a while. To be honest I have been pretty busy, and just to lazy to post, but don't worry, I'm back! Anyways, we have a lot of catching up to do. As you would know if you read my blog entry from a few days back, I was so nervous for Homecoming. I decided to work the game, and a one other activity and I felt so overwhelmed and anxious. But I did it! I had a lot of fun and I met a lot of amazing people that I never even talked to. I was also freaking out about the actual dance. I hate crowds with a burning passion because I always feel judged. I have this fear that my friends are just going to abandon me and I am going to be left alone to sit by myself while everyone else has fun. Guess what though? That didn't happen. In fact I actually had a great time! I talked to a lot of different people, and grew closer with some of my friends. I also really pushed myself just to "let loose" because a lot of times that is really hard f...
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You don't know me Until You Know Me

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When people look at me they see a girl. They see a shy girl with short hair, blue eyes, decent clothing, and a smile, and then they assume my life is perfect. They assume I've never had any life troubles, and that I don't know what hard is. They assume I'm perfect, and they assume I'm happy. The truth is, behind my smile and my smooth skin there is a rough background. There is a story, a scary story. I know what's above seems almost too deep, but this is how I feel everyday. I feel like people just assume who I am, and it kind of hurts. It's like I'm automatically supposed to be what they think of me. I remember last year in Algebra I sat next to someone who was very open about their past and current issues. All I remember is that person said something along the lines of "Kara has probably had the perfect life." It kinda stung. I know anyone who is reading this can relate. We've all felt this way. I just needed to get it off my chest because ...
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Homecoming Nerves

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Well hello wonderful person! I hope you are having a fabulous day! Personally I have been doing really well. I know a few blog entry's ago I mentioned how I had a show and tell presentation in my English class, and I just wanted to fill you all in on that. The object that I shared was my Kaleidescope magazine, which if you don't know is where the piece "No Exceptions" I wrote is. (If you are curious about that piece you can find it at the very bottom of my blog.) Anyways, I felt that I needed to open up more to my classmates about my personal life so they could understand me better. I shared with them a little bit about my anxiety and O.C.D, and it felt really good to open up to people. A lot of times I come off as rude to people, but I'm not rude, I'm just scared. Now I feel like some more people understand that better. So, onto the next topic. This weekend is Homecoming at my school, and I decided to do something I never would have done before. I signed up t...
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Oh, what a day

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At the moment I am feeling on top of the world. I just completes my second week of school and I already feel like a new person. First off I am talking to more people! I even shared some of my personal story with my English class. On tip of that I am finding myself handling stress a lot better which is a really good feeling. I also went to my first Spirit Clu b meeting today and I am really excited. I signed up for something I never would have done before: Selling merchandise. I really want to be around people more so that I can push myself to be more social. Oh and I almost forgot! Today I auditioned for a concert that goes on every year in my school. Normally I would've been totally stressed our, but I managed to let go of my fears and just enjoy singing! I really hope you all had an amazing day too! Keep facing your fears darling. It'll make you stronger!
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Pushing Myself to The Limit

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Bonjour! (Hello in French) I am really proud of myself! First of all I joined a new club. Last year I was completely terrified to join any type of school activity because I had thoughts telling me negative things. ButodayIconquered one of my fears. I am now in a club and I actually enjoyed it! Also, I am auditioning for concert at school with my friend! I am honestly terrified, but I am pushing myself and I'm actually quite excited about it! Like i have said before, this is going to be the year of pushing myself to my limits. I would totally encourage you guys to do the same thing! Push yourself, even if it is something really small. No matter what it will make a difference in your recovery. I'll keep you all updated on all my school drama. Until tomorrow!
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You Can Do It

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Hey everyone! I hope you had a good Tuesday, I know mine was pretty great. School has been going good, for the two weeks I have been in it, and I am only a tad stressed. The only thing I am worried about at the moment is gym. What if I'm not fast enough? What if I get teased? I just need to work up the strength to forget about these thoughts. After all, they're just lies! To be honest I am kind of missing my therapist though. She really helped me get past my worries, but I know that at some point I have to face life on my own. Tomorrow for gym in going to walk in confident and do my best. I've got this! I think the main point of this blog entry is simple: You can do it!
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